Me: It's really time to start weeding out songs the little one's ears shouldn't hear.
iTunes: But you like all that I have to offer. I'm sure of it. You wouldn't want him missing out on great music.
Me: But I don't even remember half of what you have. I just keep moving you from computer to computer. This is the fifth computer to which I've moved you.
iTunes: But even the music I have you don't listen to every day is great for the memories. C'mon, music is great! What about your old softball team's unofficial theme song?
Me: Fair enough, I won't delete your music, I'll just make a "Safe for Kids' Ears" playlist
iTunes: Thanks man.
Me: No problem.
The Interwebs (interrupting like a drunken neighbor): Hey, HEY! I've got musics. I like musics. Let me in on this, here's a cover of it from a band you listened to at the same time
Me: Softball, late nights, college, overwhelming nostalgia convergence [head explodes]